Julie came to WAYS at 15 years of age.  Her mother had remarried and Julie’s new stepfather began sexually abusing her when she was eight years old.  The sexual abuse included intercourse.  Julie, unable to tell anyone about the abuse, started acting out in school hoping that someone would notice her. Her behaviour escalated and she ran away.  She ended up in Toronto but was terrified of the big city. Running away did attract attention to Julie and she was referred to Vanier as a “problem child”. 

Julie had a great social worker at Vanier but felt uncomfortable telling her about the ongoing sexual abuse at home.  She did tell her worker, Barb, that she did not want to live at home. Julie realized that at 16, nobody could force her to live in her family home.  Being only 15, she didn’t want to wait until her 16th birthday. Barb could see all the signs of sexual abuse and was optimistic that Julie would trust her enough to speak about what was really going on. This didn’t happen then.  However, Barb did support Julie and made the referral to Belton House.

Julie was in residence for 2 ½ years.  It was almost a year before she trusted anyone enough to talk about what was really going on in the family home.  When she did disclose her abuse, the floodgates opened and there was no stopping her.

Julie, like many other sexually abused children, held her “secret” in for so many years it became extremely painful.  In abused children’s minds, they go over and over how they will “tell their story”. They are convinced that once they do, all the pain and emotional trauma will stop, unaware that this initial step is just the beginning of a very long and painful recovery. Young girls, including Julie, believe that once they have told someone their story, the nightmares will stop and they can feel safe again.  

Julie was a strong, bright and determined 15-year-old. It stunned her when her mother chose to support and continue living with her abusive, alcoholic stepfather. Julie thought once her secret was out, mom would kick her step-dad out and Julie, her sister and her mother could live happily ever after.  Instead, she had to accept the “rejection” of her mother. Julie also lost contact with her little sister because she was not welcome in the family home.

With the support of Barb and the WAYS’s residential team, Julie decided to charge her stepfather with sexual abuse.  She literally had nothing else to lose.  She remained in the program throughout this process.  Her stepfather was found guilty and given a five-year prison term.  At the time, this was the largest sentence handed out in London for this type of crime.

Julie lived at Belton House for 2 ½ years.  The court process was a very long one and she required our support to see it through. 

Julie finished high school and held a job working at a bowling alley that she maintained her university days at The University of Western Ontario where she completed her master’s degree. Julie ventured to Japan and taught English as a second language for two years.  She returned in December 2001 and recently a research position with Toronto General Hospital with a starting salary of  $53,000 a year.

The WAYS staff team that worked with Julie in her youth has become her family.  Julie was never able to “have her mother” back after the disclosure.  She has learned to accept this and move on.  She is able to have a relationship with her sister after many lost years.   Julie credits WAYS for supporting and believing in her and providing her with the ability to be successful and strong in her life.